on the cheap and sleazy side (www.cheapandsleazy.net)
Ye Olde Cheap and Sleazy Chili
Cold Outside? Make This!
It's getting close to winter ... and therefore just a bit on the cool side, weather-wise! When that happens in the vicinity of the Cheap and Sleazy Labs™, you know what that means ... yes, that's right: Chili!
Just to be clear: I'm not talking about any ol' canned chili with (zzzzz ....) ground beef. No, I'm talking about chili you make yourself ... with STEAK.
The good news is this recipe is easy enough such that even a guy who's expertise in the kitchen consists of microwave buritos, microwave TV dinners and microwave popcorn can do it!
The bad news? There is no bad news! ... unless, of course, you prefer your microwave buritos, microwave TV dinners and microwave popcorn ....
If you're not hungry after reading this article, you must've just ate!
Enjoy!
-o0o-
"Baby, it's Cold Outside ..."
Yes, it's fall ... getting closer to winter. If you live in the Pacific North Wet as I do, you know that fall means more rain ... except this time of year, it begins to get cold ... and sometimes, downright mean!
I'm talkin' about the "slap-you-in-the-face-with-hail" kind of mean!
If you've ever been caught outside in the rain when you were a kid, did your mom ever greet you with a steaming cup of hot soup or something when you came home? No? Well, me neither ... but it sure looked nice on those commercials!
If you're living alone (or worse, you're living with one of those guys (or gals) whose cooking (mis) adventures usually involve frozen TV dinners and microwave burritos), I have just the thing to get you that "warm you up inside" feeling you may have seen once on TV when you were a kid (those of you under 20 are exempt!).
Alas, you'll have to do your own cooking ... but trust me: It'll be worth it!
What You'll Need
In fact, writing this recipe up has made me a bit hungry for some of my Cheap and Sleazy Chili ... so I stopped by my local Safeway store, and did some shopping:
The Cheap and Sleazy Chili Ingredients (Less the Chipotle Peppers)
As for how much all this cost (including the missing Chipotles): $1.00 each for the black beans, kidney beans and the tomatoes, $.79 for the corn, $1.85 for the chili seasonings, $1.99 for the chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, and (wait for it ...) $3.06 for the steak ... which adds up to $10.69.
All told, everything on this list (less the crock pot, of course) should run you about $12.00, max. Shop wisely, and you might be able to get it down to $10.00 ... or less!
Even better, once you buy that first can of chipotle peppers, since you only need one (you do have an empty jar to store those peppers in, right?), you can chop off that $2.00 next time you need to make chili ... so technically, all the ingredients I bought actually cost $8.70!
Not bad ...!
"Yeah, but I just bought a can of chili for $1.00 ... I think I came out way ahead!"
Yes, you did ...! But for one person, this recipe will last about four days. Your can of chili will be gone long before then. Say, did I mention that steak in this recipe ...? Did your can of chili come with steak, or just ground beef?
"Well ...."
No? Thought not.
About Them Thar Chipotles ....
You can find the peppers in small or large cans (if you can't find it, check to see if your store has an "Ethnic" or Hispanic aisle). Thus far, I have found two brands in my local Safeway: Embasa and La Costeña:
A Tale of Two Chipotles
Thus far, I have only used the Embasa brand ... but I note that there doesn't appear to be a lot of the adobo sauce in it!
In fact, if you pick up the two cans and shake them back and forth a bit (as I did during my big shopping expedition), one (La Costeña) seems to slosh a bit more than the other (Embasa) ... so next time, I plan on buying the La Costeña brand.
Update (18JAN10)
I bought a can of the La Costeña brand recently, and mixed the contents with the remainder of my Embasa chipotle peppers in an empty jelly har that I saved just for that purpose (well, not just for that purpose, but ... well, you know what I mean). When it came time to make another batch of chili, I was more easily able to get that spoonful of Adobo sauce, which resulted in a batch of chili that had just the right hint of chipotle-instilled smokey taste and a slight bit of fire ...!
In short, buy the La Costeña brand!
Hot Stuff!!
Fair warning ... chipotle peppers are basically jalepeño peppers in their ripe form -- when the young green jalepeño peppers turn red, they are then dried and smoked, giving them a sort of smoky flavor (take a whiff when you open the can!).
This recipe calls for you to take JUST ONE of the peppers in the (non-resealable; what's up with that?!) can, cut it into small pieces, and dump it into your crock pot.
Why am I telling you this?
Because in one of the two recipes I used to create this recipe, the author told a sad tale of a friend who misread the instructions and used THE WHOLE CAN in her chili!
As you might guess, her chili was too hot for anyone to eat ... but, when mixed in with four other pots full of chili, the temperature (eventually) came down to a tolerable level ... so, consider that tale your warning!!
ONE chiptole pepper per pot of chili!!!!
Sorry to yell ... but hopefully you won't replicate that tale of woe!
Let's Get Started!
First, toss in that packet of chili seasonings.
Grab that steak, and season it as you wish ... then brown it in a pan on medium heat.
Warning!!
For those of you who are not living alone, this stage can be problematic: Your roomie will smell the steak cooking, and will WANT SOME ...!! Fight them off by showing them that the meat isn't done. Usually, that does the trick ... but the more persistent ones will insist that you cook the meat longer!
Ignore your roomie, and toss that steak into the crock pot.
Also, as you are just browning the meat, when you're done, it should probably be a bit on the rare (say "raw") side ... so, while tempting, DON'T EAT IT!
Update (23JUN10)
In keeping with the teachings of the authors of Cheater BBQ and some instructions I found online for a Chinese dish (I forget what), I recently tried a technique where you basically score the meat before cooking ... and I added a step that might make those Cheater BBQ folk proud: I let the meat sit in a bowl of liquid smoke for about ten minutes (five minutes on each side), and then I transferred the contents of the bowl into the pan I use to cook the steak.
Came out great--!
While the steak is cooking, open your can of whoopass Chipotle Chili Peppers in Adobo Sauce, grab one of those peppers, and cut it into small pieces ... then get a teaspoon of the Adobo sauce, and toss them both into the crock pot.
Now go ahead and cut that steak into bite-size chunks, and toss them into your crock pot.
Next, open the beans and drain both of them, and toss the beans into the crock pot.
Now (optional, remember ...!) open that can of corn or peas, and toss that into the pot; you can drain it if you wish. BUT, if you have kids or live with people who think Red Hot candies are too hot and aren't too happy with spicy foods, adding that sweet juice from the corn or peas might make it more tolerable for those whiners them.
Next, open your can of tomatoes. If they're whole, cut them into bite-sized chunks, and pour them along with the juice, into the crock pot.
Update (18JAN10)
After doing some research, I found mention of a chili powder called "Chile Ancho Powder." It took a while, but I finally found some at my local Central Market store. I bought a three ounce packet. If you use this instead of the chili seasonings listed in the ingredients, use one to three tablespoons of this powder.
Oh, and add about $4.00 to your total ...! Fortunately, it's not an ingredient you'll need to buy every time, so .....
You'll need a spice jar to keep the chili powder in, because the Chile Ancho Powder comes in a plastic bag that doesn't re-seal!
Update (23JUN10)
Three tablespoons went into the batch I made for my school's potluck ... and it was very hot! I recommend sticking to just ONE tablespoon.
I have also discovered it is best to place the chili powder AND the chipotle pepper and Adobo sauce into the crock pot first. This way, the flavor more readily will permeate the chili.
As for how it went over at the potlucks, the first batch that was too, too hot I made too much, and I made too much, so I had leftovers. The second batch disappeared pretty quickly -- mostly because everybody bought deserts, and the chili was the only main dish there that day!
Add in that 1/4 teaspoon of baking soda, then stir the whole mess around.
Ready to be Cooked! (Note the Pink Steak ....)
Avoid Making "Chili Stew"
I used to just toss everything into the crock pot, canned juice and all ... but I discovered something:
If you do that, you don't end up with chili; you end up with chili stew!
You don't want chili stew, so ensure you drain the beans before you toss them into your crock pot. To do this, I use a tuna fish strainer.
It's a bit on the messy side, but it gets the job done ... and that's what counts!
Now, the hard part: Set your crock pot's timer for three hours on low ... and go Elsewhere.
Did I tell you this recipe was easy, or what?!?
Chili: Done
"Dude -- What's With the Baking Soda?"
A good question ...! Let's just say it cuts down on certain noxious bodily emissions, and leave it at that, okay?
If you followed these simple directions correctly, it is time for you to enjoy the fruits (veggies?) of your labors, and try the chili! If it's hot enough to burn your tongue off, you may have went overboard on the chipotle peppers!
Not sure why, but I enjoy a little Jasmine rice with my chili! That link takes you to the directions to make rice ... in your crock pot!
Might have been a good idea to mention that earlier, I guess ...! Sorry about that.
Enjoy!
Coffee mug? No ... Chili Mug!
In the "Coming Up Real Soon Now" Department:
When I can, I will update this article on how to use dry beans, your own spices, ground by a mortar and pistle!
Cooking beans you buy in bulk or in a plastic bag in a crock pot is a skill worth learning to do ... and making your own chili powder is as well!
Look for that addition in the early part of next year (January or February).
-o0o-
References: Cheater BBQ, by Mindy Merrell and R.B. Quinn; Chili Madness: A Passionate Cookbook, by Jane Butel, and Not Your Mother's Slow Cooker Cookbook, by Beth Hensperger and Julie Kaufmann